Question: My sister and her husband avoid saying no to their children for fear that this could have a harmful effect. Is there any basis to this?

Answer: They are wrong. Saying ‘‘yes’’ all the time and never saying ‘‘no’’ is harmful. The child will not learn boundaries and will have a difficult time later on when teachers or friends tell him ‘‘no’’. The word ‘‘discipline’’ means to train and instruct and to do this effectively, you have to occasionally say ‘‘no’’. Sometimes parents avoid this for reasons apart from a fear of harming the child – they may have their own issues of having had very strict parents and thus are trying to overcompensate by being the opposite. Sometimes it could also be out of guilt for not spending enough time with their child.