DJ Shan Wee: My favourite time with my sons is when they play by themselves

June 12, 2018
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    We’ve come to know him for his smart wit, quick quips on the airwaves and writing skills, but to his two children, Shan Wee is just “Dad”, and a super one too!

    “I have the luxury of being a very hands-on father because of my work hours. I helm the 4 to 8 pm weekday timeslot on Kiss92, so I spend most of the morning with the two boys and I’ve found that as they’ve got older, they just get nicer,” shares Shan, who is a parenting columnist for The Straits Times, and author of the book 99 Rules For New Dads.

    Related: DJ Shan Wee: Giving my kids screen time lets me recharge

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    While the parent-child relationship is one of the most special ones, it is natural that the dynamics between them will evolve over time – a phenomenon Shan himself has witnessed firsthand.

    “Sometimes I say that my favourite time with my two boys is when they play by themselves. For so many years our boys were quite clingy; they always needed Dad to be with them or to play with them,” he explains.

    Related: Here’s why George Young is a very involved dad

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    “So when I see them being able to play by themselves or with each other, I consider it a progression. Plus, to see siblings get along well is the true pleasure of being a parent.”

    The radio deejay also says his two sons have very different personalities, and have gone through their own significant changes over time.

    Related: Andie Chen: Take responsibility for your child’s behaviour

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    “A year ago, I would’ve been talking about how my older one is quite difficult and my younger one is the sweetheart, but they go through different phases. In certain situations, Ciaran is more obedient and Ruan becomes the troublemaker, but it swings back and forth,” he shares.

    “I suppose it keeps you rewarded because sometimes you think, if both these kids were consistently terrible, you’d be like, ‘that’s it, I’m done, I’m checking out’, but you’ll always find some good in them.”

    Related: Ben Yeo: My cookbooks are my gift to my children

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    Personalities aside, he confesses he still doesn’t see very much of himself in his children. “I’m not your laugh-a-minute, chuckle brother, you know?,” he shares honestly.

    “My general nature is quite quiet and sombre. As a child I was very calm and docile, whereas Ciaran and Ruan are pretty charged up.”

    Related: Zheng Geping: I don’t believe in spoonfeeding my kids

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    This Father’s Day, Shan doesn’t have anything concrete planned out with his family, but wants to remind people that parenting takes two.

    “I feel like dads get a lot of undue privilege. If I’m carrying my kid through the supermarket, when they’re little babies, then people will notice that and say ‘Aww… what a good dad’, whereas they wouldn’t say ‘Aww… what a good mum’. So, I still think fathers get more credit than is due.”

    A version of this article first appeared on Singapore Women’s Weekly.

    (Photos: SWW and Instagram/dadleycooper)

    Related: Daniel Wu: Family is my number 1 priority

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